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Gadfly - November 28th, 2005

November 28th, 2005

November 28th, 2005
02:14 am

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The Signs They Are A-Changin'
For the second time in my life someone has successfully guessed my astrological sign. And, I can't think of a third time when someone even tried to guess and failed. So, two-for-two. Which wouldn't be so depressing if I didn't have the most godawful sign ever. Other people get cool-sounding signs like lions and scorpions and archers and I get a fucking flower girl. The virgin. Yay.

Now, I don't actually believe in this crap. Actually, I find it hard to believe in anything outside of my immediate sensory perceptions. This is why I do not believe in Africa or Australia. Since none of my LJ friends are from Africa or Australia, I know you will not be able to prove me wrong. In any case, astrology seems like total bunk. So how is it that people can guess these things? I just don't get it.

The first person to guess my sign was an ex-girlfriend. She guessed, not only my sign, but about twenty other people's signs, over the course of my dating her. It always blew my mind. I only saw her get one or two wrong. She would guess after meeting people and talking to them for less than half-an-hour or so. At no point did any of these people provide their birth-dates before she guessed. If they had, it wouldn't have been quite so amazing, I suppose.

Why do I hate my sign? First of all, I resent things that I have no control over. Had I a choice, I would have been a Leo. Both because lions are infinitely cooler than virginal flower girls and because, well, the traits associated with Leo are just so much more interesting and fun-seeming than those associated with Virgo. Instead of dull and intellectual, I would get to be egocentric and a hit with the ladies... roar!

That ex-girlfriend above had a book called "Sexual Astrology" or some such... and it was a fascinating read, even though astrology is bunk, I guess. Each of the twelve chapters on the signs detailed such interesting info as what signs were compatible with what signs and each sign's favoured sexual position was (At that point in my life, I don't think I realized that there were twelve -- Collect them all!). Suffice to say, I applied my Virgo analytical mind to that part of the book, several times.

Anyway, the chapter on Virgo was depressing. Let's just say it was much thinner than the other chapters, and move on. Apparently, Virgos are not compatible with anyone -- even other Virgos.

So, I asked the person who guessed my sign this weekend, "How the hell did you guess?"

Apparently I am "very analytical and anal"... Anal, my ass!

One reason that I do not go by the name I was given at birth is because I do not like that name. Why should I have to be burdened by my parents' poor taste? Similarly, why should I be burdened with the rather arbitrary birth-date with which I was provided? From now on, I am pushing back my birth-date by twenty days to August 10th, which will bring me right into the middle of the Leo month (and none of this 'cusp' crap either).

I am now a Leo... Hear me roar!

Current Mood: Leonine
Current Music: Black Rebel Motorcycle Club -- US Government

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